How to print on both sides of the paper

Computers on campus do the deal automatically; they print double-sided (aka two-sided or duplex) without being asked. This was very much taken for granted until I linked my laptop to the campus network, installed a print client & (remote) printer, sent off a doc for printing, and woe betide - it came back single sided. The woe part stems from the fact that 1) printing costs money and 2) the document was a rare whopper.

After searching every nook and cranny of printer settings and help files I was in despair. How oh how does this option show up on campus, but not on my own laptop? Doing it manually with 50-page scripts seemed a good idea a decade ago, but I digress...

The crux of the problem: some obscure widget termed "Duplex Unit". Yes it's a breeze to activate, and no, I didn't figure that out until my supply of clickable tabs was exhausted. To locate aforementioned widget:

Computer > Control Panel > Printers > select, then right click on default printer > Properties > Device Settings > Installable Options > Duplex Unit (for 2-Sided Printing)

(Apologies if you're not using some retarded form of MS Windows.)

Once you've changed it to "installed", the option to print on both sides of the paper will show up in the printer's settings (Printing Preferences > Finishing > Print On Both sides).

You can stop headdesking now.

How to fly in dreams

1. Start lucid dreaming.

2. Run through some place with an open view of the sky. A dusty, sun-scorched village in Africa might work well.

3. Conjure up a sense of urgency. Having a madman hot on your tracks helps.

4. RUN like your life depended on it - it probably will (see above).

5. Spread your arms while running flat out, hazarding a leap or two as you tear through said village. Take notice of your surroundings and your urge to outrun your pursuer.

6. Get desperate.

7. Take a deep breath and launch off in earnest. Gravity will pull you down, but now that you have a split-second experience of what it feels like to fly, nothing can stop you. You have already gained momentum, and also knowledge of flight. That's all you'll need. Keep flapping those arms and bobbing inches from the ground, occasionally scraping your toes through the dirt, steadily, steadily now...a bit higher...and next thing you know, the village has shrunken to a toy town and you really are flying!*


*Well that was how I learned to fly anyway.

How to embed Google Maps in Google Sites

This may seem very obvious, but anyone who's been there knows that copying and pasting the HTML code does not work. The official gadget doesn't work either - you need an API key for that. In fact, I spent a good 1.5 hours wading knee deep in iframes and parameters before realising that the crux of the problem was superfluous ampersand codes. Ah the irony of it all. Being the kindly soul I am, I'm obliged to write up this tutorial in case anyone is tearing their hair out over this matter. Not that I've done so, mind you. (Close though.)

Right. Chop chop.

1. In the Google map you want to embed, click on "link" (in the top right corner), then copy the contents of the box labelled "Paste HTML to embed in website".

2. Paste the chunk of code into Notepad or some other text editor, and locate the URL that comes after "src=". Discard the rest. Then do a search (Ctrl+f) for "amp;", and remove every single instance of "amp;" in the code.

3. In the Google Sites page editor, click on "Insert" > "More" > "Add gadget by URL". Here's the URL:
http://hosting.gmodules.com/ig/gadgets/file/108621208120033273647/my_gadgets_gs.xml

(Updated 21.7.09. The old link from philippe.chappuis.googlepages.com doesn't work anymore)

4. Once you click "Add" the setup panel should come up. Grab the modified code from step 2 and paste it into the "File" field. Adjust settings as needed, click "OK", and voilà - there you have it!

All we're doing here is employing a gadget that does the work of an iframe. (The gadget in question comes from [this page].) But for some stupid reason the iframe codes given out by Google Maps have ampersand codes in place of "&" which renders them quite useless. Ampersand codes are used in HTML to make sure symbols display properly - beats me why they would turn up here.

More on ampersand codes:

HTML Ampersand Character Codes

Slightly tangential - a useful list of parameters I came across earlier:

Google Map Parameters

The ULTIMATE Cure For Procrastination

Regarding procrastination self help articles: the people who preach time management and reward mechanisms and whatnot clearly don't get the amazing medical condition that is procrastination. Procrastinators are not dumb (and in all probability way smarter than your average bloke). They know exactly what they should and shouldn't be doing. They have probably researched the underlying psychology so thoroughly that a book length essay on the subject would be a no-brainer. And yet they procrastinate. It's mind-numbingly impossible but it's true.

Therefore I present the ULTIMATE cure for procrastination, sans frills - listen up now -

The key to ending procrastination is simply to press Alt+F4 then "Enter" on your keyboard, in rapid succession.

Alt+F4 then "Enter". Keep doing it. That's it. No strings attached. If it doesn't work then nothing else will, and you can go back to shuffling through that vicious cycle all over again :)


Pssst...you know you're a procrastinator when your subconscious spits out [stuff like this] XD

Insomnia, The Beast

Impossible to tame, dangerous to handle.

It lurks in the darkest corners of your mind, unobtrusive and good-natured, that is, until the lights go out.

It is a sly creature, with a temper of quicksilver and a wit of gold. Do not expect it to fall for the same snare twice in a row. Plan your moves oh so carefully, or else...suffer its displeasure.

It's WAR, grasshopper, an ongoing WAR. I've fought it for over half a decade, I ought to know...back when I was a young'un...

*Cough cough* Enough melodrama.

Here's a taste of the insomnia remedies I've tried, by rough order of success:

1. Screensaver Method

I devised this one myself: as your conscious mind rages out of control, bring up random, morphing mental images in the background. Make it a point to be completely intuitive and let the images flow freely into one another (ASLs may prefer using sounds). You need to be slightly ditzy beforehand for it to work (not guaranteed).

2. Music

Either it WORKS or it fails spectacularly. I've seen my share of dead batteries.

3. Lavender

Whether it's in tea, soap, shower gel, ointment, or the darned thing itself, I've tried it. Works a treat, but only with copious amounts and in conjunction with at least two other remedies. Shame.

4. Full Body Bind

Not the HP kind, you've been warned. It's just my name for a relaxing technique that involves loosening up your every muscle from tip to toe. Takes quite a while, and may sometimes backfire and leave you perkier than before.

5. Sleep Inducing Exercises

Oh the whole bunch. The "descending/ascending the stairs" one. The "3 sights, 3 sounds, 3 senses - real then imagined" one. The "breathe all funny" one. Can't even remember their names. Takes quite a while, and may sometimes backfire and leave you perkier than before.

6. Reverse Psychology

Keep your eyes open, leave the lights on, read something challenging etc. About as useful as long-term weather forecasts.

7. Proper Psychology

Close your eyes, turn the lights off, do mentally unchallenging tasks...did I mention long-term weather forecasts?

8. Eating Healthy

Nice light meal in the early evening, cup of warm milk before bed. Makes about as much difference as the following.

9. Eating Unhealthy

Pig out on various comfort foods. Makes about as much difference as no. 8.

10. Mantra Chanting

Cold be hand and heart and bone, and cold be sleep under...wow perfect trochaic tetrameter...not.

11. Physical Exercise

If a full day of vigorous tree-chopping fails to put you to sleep, I don't see what can.

12. De-stress

The beauty of nagging thoughts is that they actually nag. You can't just put them down on paper and be done with them. That's the whole point, don't you see?

13. Counting Sheep

My record is around 420. Got fed up and did something else.

14. Drugs

Don't be tempted. It's not worth the drowsiness. Melatonin is easier on the system, but it doesn't have much effect on it either (that's probably just me).

15. Quenching Heart Fires With Kidney Waters

It's a practise found in Traditional Chinese Medicine, and simply means "focus your attention on the acupoint in the middle of your soles". I do have plenty of respect for TCM, but surely this is the biggest pile of *&^%$# if there ever was one.

How To Locate Missing Things

This is the procedure I go through when I can't find something:

1. Pinpoint the time you are 100% sure you last had it.

2. Recall the flow of events & your state of mind from that point onwards.

3. Locate the places where they occurred.

4. Mentally reconstruct your conscious from that point onwards, using the above information.

5. Take note of any probable weak spots.

6. Investigate those weak spots, either logically or by asking around, or by going there bodily and searching the floors:D

It may seem quite daunting but I assure you it isn't because all of that is already in your head, you just have to summon it forth. I resort to the method quite frequently because I'm such a scatterbrain! X(

(Originally an email reply to Arjan)

Dummies Guide To A Fulfilling Life

(a.k.a. my personal Principles of Being)

To lead a fulfilling life, you simply have to understand that

• 1. YOU ARE UNIQUE
• 2. YOU ARE UNIQUE FOR A PURPOSE
• 3. YOU ARE ABLE TO FULFIL THAT PURPOSE
• 4. YOU WILL FULFIL THAT PURPOSE

(Please note that you may not necessarily know what that purpose is - I often use the analogy of "a candle in the dark" - your path will be revealed to you as you follow it.)

Contemplate those words until every single atom in your body nods in belief. You will then begin to see the world in a new light, go on to accomplish the unthinkable and live a life bursting with richness. (But not necessarily "riches"!)

I have lived by them and proven it to be true.

(The above is just my tuppence worth - feel free to take it if you're out of change:])

Notes On Stormspotting

Stormspotting is the thrilling art of spotting storms. What makes it particularly challenging is recording bolts of lightning on video (or in my case, the pathetic Nokia7360).

Disclaimer: stormspotters are in no way related to trainspotters!

It takes few things to stormspot:

• Storm season
• Shelter from the rain
• A wide field of vision
• Something to record with
• Patience & luck

Many thanks to our dorm balcony for the shelter and altitude and 180 degree view for top-notch stormspotting.

The idea is simple:

You point your recording device at a fixed spot in general direction of the storm, wait until the right moment, then start recording! (If you have a good camera handy of course it is best to take long exposure photos instead of fussing around with video.) Get it right, and a streak of lightning will be captured on your screen within 15 seconds. Sounds really easy, but it is a major feat if all you have is a lousy cell phone recorder that takes seconds to respond...in such cases, to stormspot, you had better...

Know your target:

• Which direction is the storm coming from? According to my experience, the best time to record is when the action centre is within 10km~3km radius. Too far and the clouds get in the way, too near and lightning bolts go off on all sides: you'll be tempted to turn away from your "spot". Over here, storms usually close in from the south or northwest. I've yet to see a storm coming from the east.
• How far apart are the lightning bolts? During peak times it's usually 10~30 seconds. It takes all my resolution to wait those 10 seconds before recording again! (Which is necessary because my Nokia7360 has only 4mb of space so every second is precious.)
• How long will it take for the storm to pass/rage itself out? I make an educated guess based on wind speed and cloud cover. This gives an idea of how long the stormspotting session is going to last, since there is no point in stormspotting after the chances have dropped too low...

And trust your senses:

• Pick a spot and stick to it. Once I've decided on "the spot", I try very hard not to wander. Being distracted by will waste valuable time and opportunities. Keep in mind that you are very very unlikely to outrun lightning!
• Crying over spilt milk is...well, pointless. There are countless times that I missed the most magnificent bolt by seconds. The stormspotter's bane...grrrr. You'll just have to trust that you will capture "The One" sometime, somehow. Probably with lots of practice. Stormspotting sure is character building stuff!

How To See A Mirage

What, you've never seen a mirage before? Fear not, they are actually not as incredibly rare as some may think. In fact, you might see one today if you know where to look!

Things You Will Need

• A hot, sunny day
• Protection from the sun
• A loooong stretch of road, preferably over a hill*
• A camera, if you're up to it

*Safety note - If you are on foot or on a bike, please please do not attempt to observe a mirage in traffic. You can get seriously hurt. It's best to choose an unused road, or better still, observe from inside a moving car while someone else is driving.

Steps

• 1. Go to the very end of your chosen area and stand facing it.
• 2. Make sure your observation spot is safe, i.e. devoid of traffic and other hazards.
• 3. Crouch down slowly, keeping your eyes on the stretch of road in front of you. At some point you will start to see wisps of grey stretching out horizontally. If there's a hill, just climb the hill from the other side, watching out for said phenomenon.
• 4. Adjust your height until the wispy lines develop into clear "reflections". They will resemble patches of water on the road.
• 5. Admire your mirage! (And take some snapshots if you have a camera handy.)

What you see is an inferior mirage, because the mirror image is under the original one. It is caused by light being bent by a layer of hotter air near the ground, and is actually due to refraction, not reflection. See the links for more on mirages.

How did I think of this? Well I see them every single day in summer. There's a hilly stretch of road on the way to school, so they dance into view whether I ask nicely or not. Guess it's a comfort of living in the subtropics.

Further Reading:

• Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mirage
• An Introduction to Mirages: http://mintaka.sdsu.edu/GF/mirages/mirintro.html